A common question in Tulsa, Oklahoma family law is, “how much should grandparents be involved with grandchildren?”
This is because the conflict between generations does not end when children are grown up and have families. Many parents question the decisions their offspring make, especially those related to their parenting. Values and many other things are perceived differently between generations, and these differences can get quite pronounced when it comes to parenting.
Many times, grandparents (and great-grandparents for that matter) find it easier to step back and allow the parents to make most of the decisions regarding their children. Grandparents generally form bonds of friendship with grandchildren and enjoy memorable times together. They steer clear of making decisions for their grandchildren.
When To Involve Grandparents In Decision Making
However, there are situations where the best interest of the grandchildren is served when a grandparent steps in and helps make decisions for them. For instance, if the grandchild’s parent suffers a medical condition that affects their ability to raise the child adequately. In these cases, a grandparent may step in and make parenting-related decisions on behalf of their adult child. In such a situation, the grandparent should be willing to play this role. Also, it is best when there is agreement within the family.
Sometimes, a grandparent is in poor health themselves and unable to help raise their grandchild. The grandparent may not also be able to finance any role they are expected to play in the life of their grandchild. Thus, they should be exempted from such expectations.
A situation that a Tulsa grandparents rights lawyer sees more often is when a grandparent is cut off from the life of their grandchild, yet they want to be involved. Their child may not be in a position to raise their children; however, the healthy parent does not wish to include the grandparents in decisions regarding their grandchildren. Such cases often end up in court if the grandparent feels strongly about being involved.
As you may already know, Oklahoma grandparents’ visitation rights cases can be costly and painful to all involved parties. It would be best to seek out-of-court mediation with the other parent, as this is what would be in the best interests of the children. But if you are stuck in such a situation, talk to our Tulsa grandparents rights attorney and walk the road with a trustworthy professional by your side.
When Grandparents Do Not Have To Involve Themselves
Your child, with the support of their spouse, may cut you off from seeing your grandchildren. Such a decision may be very painful to you, but probably is a reflection of the bad relationship you have with your child. Despite your distress, you may have to live with the decision if your grandchild is in an intact family unit.
You may choose to see a Tulsa grandparents’ visitation rights lawyer, but the law upholds the conclusion of the parents in such a case. If the grandkids are already past the age of 18, they get to decide if they want to have relationships with their grandparents. Teens under the age of 18 may also be allowed to choose if they wish to visit with their grandparents.
If your grandchild is in poor health and requires specialized treatment of which you do not approve, it is a good idea to allow their parents to make such decisions. It may already be hard enough for parents to make such decisions without a grandparent complicating it with their opinion. Unless a grandparent’s judgment is sought, they should try supporting the parents’ choice.
Finances may also hinder you from making some decisions for your grandchildren. For instance, you cannot decide what they do on holidays if you are expected to host them but are unable to do so. You cannot also determine what they do while on vacation if you and your child are unable to pay your costs to be with them.
Grandparents Can Easily Adopt Their Grandchildren
If for some reason, your grandchildren are up for adoption, foster care, or require a guardian, grandparents are given preference under Oklahoma law. It is considered best for the kids to place them with their elder relatives.
When grandparents have their grandchildren who are still minors under their care, they can make decisions for them by reverting to their values and resources. This is an instance where grandparents cannot be questioned for choosing what they deem best for their grandchildren, irrespective of what the parents of the children would have wanted.
No-Obligation Consultation: Tulsa Grandparents Rights Attorney
Whatever you are dealing with regarding rights to your grandchildren, talk to a Tulsa grandparents rights attorney about it. Our attorney is experienced and knowledgeable and will advise you on the best course of action. With our attorney, you will determine the best, most likely remedy for your family matter.
Call (918) 994-1600 today to set up an initial, no-cost, no-obligation consultation or click here to send a consultation request online.